At exactly 9:03 p.m. CST on Thursday evening, I was approximately 200 pages into my 300 page book and 0 pages into writing a 6 page paper in which I was expected to originate constructive, enlightening thoughts about the book. Both were due in less than 12 hours. I had at least accomplished one thing: I had successfully reverted back to undergrad. What is one to do when he or she comes face to face with imminent defeat? An all-nighter, my friend.
I am currently sustaining—barely— on 31 waking hours, but I am officially too old to be doing so. Contrary to what Common Grounds may allege, sleep is not overrated, and here’s how I know…
First, upon getting dressed for a day that had no definitive ending or beginning, I dressed myself in two pairs of underpants. I do not normally wear two pairs of underpants. Somehow I had forgotten that I already had on one pair, a discovery not realized until I was in the bathroom stall at work.
Then, I could not figure out why the stupid Coke machine would not take my dollar. No matter how hard I shoved, the dollar would not slide into the exasperating slot; it would not even try to grab for it. At just the moment I was about to relent, a sweet, soft-spoken freshman who had patiently been awaiting her turn said, “I think the problem is that the slot you’re using is for a student ID card. Like, if you have Bearbucks that deduct from your card.” To quote Ecclesiastes, “there is a time to weep and a time to laugh.” Well, I nearly wept.
And lastly, not five minutes ago, I received an email from my History professor, for whom I was reading and writing all night, and she informed me that the paper I had submitted via email at 8:07 a.m. was actually my annual household budget. Evidently, instead of attaching my 6 page doctoral History paper, I attached the Crenshaw annual household income, budget, and savings spreadsheet. I don’t know how, so don’t ask. Thankfully, I had saved my actual paper to one of those stick things that Craig gave me and brought it to work. I immediately emailed the correct attachment.
Ugh… how much longer until five o’clock?!
I am currently sustaining—barely— on 31 waking hours, but I am officially too old to be doing so. Contrary to what Common Grounds may allege, sleep is not overrated, and here’s how I know…
First, upon getting dressed for a day that had no definitive ending or beginning, I dressed myself in two pairs of underpants. I do not normally wear two pairs of underpants. Somehow I had forgotten that I already had on one pair, a discovery not realized until I was in the bathroom stall at work.
Then, I could not figure out why the stupid Coke machine would not take my dollar. No matter how hard I shoved, the dollar would not slide into the exasperating slot; it would not even try to grab for it. At just the moment I was about to relent, a sweet, soft-spoken freshman who had patiently been awaiting her turn said, “I think the problem is that the slot you’re using is for a student ID card. Like, if you have Bearbucks that deduct from your card.” To quote Ecclesiastes, “there is a time to weep and a time to laugh.” Well, I nearly wept.
And lastly, not five minutes ago, I received an email from my History professor, for whom I was reading and writing all night, and she informed me that the paper I had submitted via email at 8:07 a.m. was actually my annual household budget. Evidently, instead of attaching my 6 page doctoral History paper, I attached the Crenshaw annual household income, budget, and savings spreadsheet. I don’t know how, so don’t ask. Thankfully, I had saved my actual paper to one of those stick things that Craig gave me and brought it to work. I immediately emailed the correct attachment.
Ugh… how much longer until five o’clock?!
